Terry Fox Run in Memory of Venissa

Hi everyone!

Last September, we organized a Terry Fox Run here at Trinity College to support Venissa in her battle. She was unable to attend due to her health at the time, but she was deeply touched by the support everyone showed her, and it strengthened her courage and her spirit to see that she was not alone. More than 100 people showed up to run in support of her, and together we raised over $4000 for the cause.

In the months before Venissa passed away, she repeatedly wished for us to continue the tradition of the run, even if she was no longer with us. Following her wishes, we have organized Trinity's Run in Memory of Venissa.

On Saturday, September 27th, at 1pm, we welcome all of you to join us at Trinity College, at the University of Toronto, where registration and a few speeches will occur. Together we will walk over to Queen's Park, where the run will begin; we will run together in her memory.

We will be collecting donations for the Terry Fox Foundation. I have created a group to collect donations online in her memory:
https://secure.e2rm.com/registrant/TeamFundraisingPage.aspx?teamID=576344&langPref=en-CA
Or if you prefer, you can create your own fundraising page for this event to collect donations from your family and friends:
https://secure.e2rm.com/registrant/LocationHome.aspx?eventid=148189&langpref=en-CA&locationID=148215&Referrer=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.terryfox.org%2FCauseCampus%2FCampus_registration.html 

We will also be collecting cash on the day of the event, and selling Terry Fox t-shirts for $25 each (all proceeds are a donation to the organization).

Check out the facebook event for more information. Let me know if you have any questions or if you need help arranging a way for you to come to the run. Let's rally together and show Venissa's family and friends that we are carrying on her battle for her!

https://www.facebook.com/events/720086494728822

In Loving Memory

Hey Venissa – Though I may not know exactly where you may be, I know you are in a happier place. You have escaped the pain and the sickness, the suffering and the sorrow. Though your life was tragically short, you lived every second of it to the fullest; it truly was a beautiful life. You taught us so many things and inspired us to become better people every single day. One memory that sticks out for me was last June, about two weeks after you were diagnosed, when you called me and said, “I don’t care if I lose my arm or both arms. And my legs too, they can take my legs. I just want to live to spend time with my family.” In that minute I knew you would never go down without a fight. And I was right. You battled the cancer with such strong spirit and unrivaled courage. Every time a doctor told you your time was limited, you simply responded by having even more determination to outlive their predictions. You turned that initial three weeks into almost fourteen months. And in that time you touched the lives of so many others – whether you knew them personally or not. You taught us to enjoy every minute and find beauty in the simplest of things. We miss you so much Venissa. We will carry you with us in our hearts and our memories all our lives. You’ll always be my little chickadee. I find comfort in knowing that you are up there, somewhere, watching over us, probably dancing among the stars.

Venissa Xiao passed away peacefully in her sleep early in the morning on Wednesday, July 23, 2014. She spent her last days surrounded by her loving family – parents Lin Xiao and Juli Bai, her sisters Danica and Dayna, and her grandmother. Her parents held a private burial on Friday and buried some of her ashes. Toward the end of this week, her mom hopes to travel to sprinkle her remaining ashes in the Atlantic Ocean. In memory of Venissa, donations are being collected for the Terry Fox Foundation. Tubman Funeral Homes is organizing these donations (link below).

Let’s all share our favourite memories of Venissa! I welcome everyone to post a tribute, or simply write about a fun time you had with her. Either post it here on her blog or send it to me by email (jsg.graham@gmail.com). I hope to put together a scrapbook of our thoughts and messages and give it to her family in her memory.

Follow this link to read Venissa’s obituary and to donate on her behalf to the Terry Fox Foundation:

http://tubmanfuneralhomes.com/families-care/?id=677  

Hey Still Hanging in There

So as mentioned previously, I'm handing half of blogging duties to my friend to Jackie. That doesn't mean I'm not blogging at all, just that when I'm incapable to do so, you'll be seeing her.
My breathing has been very very difficult lately and my doctor is very worried. Please pray for me I'm honestly happy that I can see the sunrise and sunset everyday. Love you all. Talk to you all soon!

A Brief Update

Hey everyone! Hope you're ready for a little twist! For the next little while, both Venissa and I will be updating her blog occasionally. I'll be posting when she is too tired or busy with various treatments, then she will post whenever she feels up to it :) My name is Jackie - I met Venissa in high school, then we ended up in the same residence when we came to university. We had just moved into an apartment together to start our second year of school when she received her diagnosis over a year ago now. But that's enough about me!

Venissa is still in the hospital, and most of her lungs are filled with tumour progression, which is making it difficult for her to breathe. The shortness of breath is pretty terrifying, but they do have a plan to try to improve it! Today the doctors are going to try to radiate her lungs to see if they can reduce the tumour growth and make it a little easier for Venissa to breathe. Also, in the past few days they have put her on medications to keep her sedated to a certain level to help her deal with the horrible feeling of constantly being short of breath. Let's all pray that today's radiation will work to make our beautiful Venissa a little more comfortable!!!

Some Bad News

     So things have really not been going so well. I’m back in the hospital again with a pain crisis that can’t be managed by any of the pain meds that they’ve been giving me. I’ve literally been crying in pain. For some mysterious reason, in the last two days, I’ve had a little bit of pain relief, but I’m so scared the pain will come back. A ways to prevent the pain from getting too bad is to put a catheter into my spinal cord, which, please cross your fingers that they can do. Right now, I’m scared they won’t do it because my body is so weak. Okay, enough about my pain.

     The second terrible terrible news is that my oncologist wants to stop chemo and make everything from now on just pain control. Basically what I’m hearing is that they’re giving up on me and I’m done. I really don’t know what to do. I do have to admit that my body is very weak and new problems keeps on popping up. I really want to pain free and go home. I don’t know how much time I have left, but that’s how I would want to spend it.

Home, Finally

     Back from another trip to the hospital. This time, it was for 10 days of chemo and radiation. The radiation helped with the pain and the chemo went off fairly smoothly, so overall, not too terrible of an experience. Now this time, cross your fingers and toes that I can stay home for a longer period of time!!!!

     Now onto something a lot more exciting. My sisters and I are trying to raise money for the Ottawa Regional Cancer Foundation for childhood cancer research. We are planning to be a part of the Great Canadian Lemonade Standemonium to sell lemonade as part of the fundraising process. But we need your help! Please go on the following website and make a donation! A cup of lemonade for 50 cents won’t go very far, so please help us out! Thank you guys so much in advance!

http://ottawacancer.kintera.org/faf/donorReg/donorPledge.asp?ievent=1100721&supid=405899699

Medical Update 3

     Hey everyone! This is the update I promised a while ago. I’ve officially been discharged from 5 weeks of hospital stay 3 days ago. Let me bring you up to date on what has happened in the past 5 weeks and where I am now.

    I was first brought into the ER at the Ottawa General Hospital with a fever and a resting heart rate of over 150 (normal for my age range is around 60-70). I was immediately admitted with the fear that I had some type of infection that my body could not fight off. A few days into the hospital stay, my heart started beating extremely fast (above the 200’s) which is called tachycardia. That was frightening because doctors and specialists from the intensive care unit were called to my room for assessment and treatment. After numerous tests and scans, it was determined that everything looked okay (thank goodness). Not long after, my body decided it was a good idea to go unconscious while the nurse was flushing my port. This caused another uproar on the oncology floor, and yes the intensive care unit team was called again. Now again, they could not figure out what happened, so decided to keep me for further observations. Anyways, I ended up getting a week of radiation for pain and switched to a new line of chemo. The cancer has grown and I am a lot weaker than before.

     Currently, I’m in a lot of pain constantly and have to take the injectable dilaudid quite frequently. Under these circumstances, my doctors usually won’t let me out of the hospital but after my constant nagging and begging, they send me home with enough drugs to start a pretty legit drug company haha. Right now, I’m hoping that the new chemo drugs that I’m starting next week will contain the cancer and help with the pain. Obviously things could be better, but I also realize that my one year cancerversary is coming up and I am very proud to have made it through this year and hopefully I’ll have the chance to celebrate many more years to come! That's it for now! Thanks for reading :)

Quick Update

     Hey everyone! Sorry for the lack of update! I'm not feeling the greatest, so I'm going to keep this short. I'll give you a much more detailed update a little later. Remember how I was complaining about radiation burn and not being able to walk? Well, a short while after that started healing, I started a new chemotherapy regiment. About four days in, I started experiencing excruciating amount of pain down both legs. This was partly expected from what my doctors told me and what I searched up online. What I didn't expect was a high fever, which landed me in the hospital. So this was about a month ago. Yes, I have been in the hospital for a month!!!! Honestly, the hate you develop for hospital food in this period of time can go pretty deep. Anyways, during my hospital stay, I had a few scary moments, where the ICU people were called and things didn't look too good. Fortunately, I was able to come out of them and I'm feeling actually pretty okay right now. I've started radiation again for pain and now I'm on my third different line of chemo. The goal is to go home this week and consult with my doctors about the next plan of action. Once things are somewhat back to normal, I'll make sure to update you guys on the YACC retreat I went on and the other things that's been going on in my life! Thanks for reading! :D

Thank you!

     I’ve been meaning to write this piece for a long time. There are many people who deserve a long overdue thank you! First, I received the most amazing birthday gift this year. It was a journal full of well wishes from friends from high school, university, Shad Valley, Science Expo and even kind strangers. It’s such a personal gift and honestly words cannot describe how touched I am. A special thanks to Steph for putting this together! And of course thank you everyone for your encouraging words and birthday wishes!!!! They really mean the world to me!

Here are some pictures of the amazing journal:

     Secondly, I have two wonderful chemo angels, one from England and one from Germany who send me very special things through the mail every week. We’re grown to know each other over the past few months, but they started their kindness as complete strangers to me. I’ve received chocolates, flowers, tea, photos and numerous cards. You have no idea how excited I get when I get these special gifts in the mail. It really takes my mind off the next doctor’s appointment or the weird pain I’ve been getting. Thank you Manuela and Rachel! Both of you are truly very special to me.

Strength

     There is something very special strength in each on of us. Most of the time, it’d hidden underneath all our insecurities and anxieties, but it’s there. What I’m talking about is an unshakable inner strength that is the core to the human spirit. It’s not just found in a special group of people like soldiers, or the rich, or the famous. It’s in every single one of us. Since starting this battle with cancer, I’ve been complimented on how I have handled the situation. The truth is, I haven’t done anything special. Why do I say this? Because I’ve witnessed so many incredible journeys of people who hold the kind of strength that defines humanity. This is not to say that we don’t break down and cry, because I certainty do. It’s just that no matter how bleak the situation or how tired we are, there is still hope. There will always be hope.

     Tonight, this post is for Jessica Rice, a girl battling stage IV lung cancer. Since finding her blog on the internet (http://stageiv.wordpress.com), she has been a constant source of inspiration for me. In a way, she has become almost like a tree that I lean on when I can’t hold myself up.

     This battle is so terribly hard. It’s so hard sometimes that I literally lie there gasping for air. But it’s okay. I know I also possess this incredible strength that is within Jessica and everyone else on this earth.